“Are you investing time talking about what you want? Or.
Are you spending time grumbling about the current reality?”
The mindset difference between the two is day and night.”
Silence.
I was meeting with a business owner, and key personnel to discuss their 2020 growth goals. I ask these questions because I start where it matters most, mindset, which includes analyzing the words people use.
Consistently. Without realizing it, the team was using words and language patterns that prevent growth, not a goal achievement strategy. When language and the goal aren’t in sync, it’s problematic. Is there a way to change that? Let’s find out.
Obviously other variables impact a goal. And you’ve heard, language is key, before by countless people, maybe not the way I frame it.
Below you’ll see the basic premise of what I call, language alchemy, minus the cauldron.
1. Language alchemy means using words that move you closer to what you want, instead of repeatedly using words that solidify what you don’t want. An example. A colleague wants a new job. Our conversation. “I hate my job. They don’t appreciate me. I receive zero recognition for my hard work.” On it goes. True. But does that language open up a field of possibilities to land you a new job? Try this. “I bring decades of experience to an organization. I’ll retool my resume. I’ll contact ten people in my network. My new job exists right now, it’s a matter of connection.” What differences do you hear? Complaining is constrictive. Expectation, when it’s positive, is expansive.
2. Musicians innately understand that notes which vibrate at different frequencies create a specific song. They play the notes to “Hotel California” expecting to hear “Hotel California.” They don’t play the notes to “Hotel California,” expecting to hear “Hey Jude.” Words behave in similar ways. So, when attempting any goal, re-read #2. Repeat often. Why? Because to install new neural circuitry to form a different habit, repetition is essential.
3. When talking about the past doesn’t help a goal. In some instances, discussing the past has value. It can be a tool to diagnose a core problem. But if it wasn’t great, what’s the upside to obsessing over the past time and again? It’s over. But you’re talking about the past in the present. Your nervous system can’t tell the difference between what you imagine or what’s happening now. It’ll produce the same “feelings” cocktail of that past event. Does it help or hinder advancement?
4. Get a piece of paper. I’ll wait. Draw a line down the middle. On the left write the words/phrases you consistently speak and think aka self-talk. Be honest. It’s private. On the right side, list what’s in your life. Your job. Your spouse. The vacations you take. Money in your bank account etc. Look at each column. What type of connection is there between the two? Of the countless books on the word/reality correlation by numerous experts I like the way Joseph Murphy, Ph.D., D.D. addresses this topic in, “The Power of Your Subconscious Mind.”
Aside from being irrefutably inseparable, neuroscientists continue to explore the mind/body/language connection with pioneering tools to affirm the impact language has on your reality.
So, for your next team meeting bring the jelly filled crullers and Kind Bars. Decide. Instead of grumbling about “what is,” the past or problems (unless you propose three solutions), practice language alchemy. Transform patterned phrases like, “That didn’t work before,” to, “What can we try so it does work?” The ways you can rearrange inspiring words to your advantage are limitless. Consider them the tools to map your future.
Can you tell, I’m over the moon about language? It has the potential, scratch that, you have the potential to use the words that move you closer, not further away from what you want. Of the trillions of words to use, you choose. No cauldron required.
Paula M. Parker (C)
Originally published
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